Wedding Breeze

Most people in the western world believe in free love, but arranged marriages are still alive and kicking in many Asian societies. Parents may choose people from the same community to ensure traditions are kept.

When people who fall in love get married, 20% to 50% according to statistics from different parts of the world will divorce within 5 years. Hence, love cannot be the only reason that holds marriages together. Common values, and good communication are some of the other factors that hold marriages together.

I had a schoolmate who married at 18 after the ?A? Level exams. She went to India to get married, and the teacher who saw the henna designs on her arms asked her whether she got married, and she replied in the affirmative. It was a strange concept to me then. At 18, a large group of people may not even have dated yet, and one of their peers is married. My friend, who was her classmate, told me that she actually invited them to go to India for her wedding. All accommodation would be paid for. I have no idea whether her marriage works out fine, but I know of another that did not.

My former colleague?s brother had an arranged marriage. He was from the Sikh community. What happened was the wife came to Singapore to live with him, but the marriage soon soured. It soon bordered on the ridiculous when they started sleeping separately. She would wake up in the middle of the night and keep knocking on his door to disturb his sleep. Her plan was to make him as angry as possible, so that he would hit her. She even went to the tabloid to say that her husband beat her up, in order for her to get as much money out of the failed marriage as possible. The mental torture was horrible.

According to the newspaper, there are many more successful stories regarding arranged marriages. Whatever it is, couples should try to find out more about each other before marriage. They need to know the characters, the personalities, the attitudes towards money, work and family and more. At the same time, they should try to develop stable feelings towards each other.